I was inspired while I was watching the movie Patch Adams with Robin Williams. There is a scene in the move where his girlfriend is killed because she goes to help a mental patient. The movie was based on a true story, and that particular scene reminded me so much of the real life experiences I have witnessed over and over again with folks who have been abused.
Like attracts like, but as111C we can see in real life, opposites attract too. Life is always striving to balance Itself out. A perpetrator needs a victim, and a victim needs a perpetrator. Are you a victim? Are you still feeling wounded from the pain you have suffered at the hands of a perpetrator? If so then I caution you to take care, take very good care. Energetically you are still a like magnet, attracting your opposite to you to work out the idea that you are a victim.
I am not saying this to be cruel. I am saying this in hopes that this advice will protect you from further harm. There is a very good book written on this topic, it is called Women Who Love Too Much by Robin Norwood. I read it many years ago and since that time have witnessed the pattern in many people who have been abused. This book would help you understand yourself and how to heal.
In the movie this woman was abused and fell in love with Patch Adams who was an amazing healer. He was bold and crazy and funny and had unorthodox methods of healing...but they worked and he was loved by many as a result. In the movie she admired Patch and his ways and one day when she was alone she listened to a phone message from a mental patient who was crying out for help. She boldly went to his house to do what she could to help him and she was killed by him. I could see how she was trying to be like Patch...but she was not. She died because she tried to do more than she was ready and capable of doing. She attracted the experience to her like a magnet.
Another interesting point about the story is that when she first met the man she felt very uncomfortable and very uneasy with him. People who have been abused are hyper sensitive to abusers. I have had dogs I got from the pound that had been abused and they were very good at sensing harmful people and barking when they came around. Much more so than dogs I had that had not been abused.
Our feelings tell us about the intentions and energy of others. Thoughts create feelings. Harmful thoughts create feelings that are uncomfortable and painful. If we tune in we can feel the feelings of others. Did you know that? It really is quite easy to do. Most people don't realize it because we have been taught we do not have this ability, so we don't even try. Why were you taught that? Because people with harmful intentions don't want you to know they have harmful intentions! But if you try, you will discover just how easy it is to feel the intentions of others. People who have been abused are more aware of what abusive energy feels like, they have more experience. They can feel harmful thoughts coming and they are more aware of those feelings. But still too many of such people ignore the feelings.
If you are one of those people you might just need validation of those feelings...so that is what I am doing. I want to validate that you can indeed feel trouble coming and that you should walk away from it. Even if your mind tells you it is something you want, even if other people discount your feelings and even if there is no physical evidence to back it up. Pay attention to your feelings!
In order to heal yourself, you need to work through your thoughts and feelings about what has happened to you. You need to learn new ways of thinking and looking at yourself and other people you experience in the world. You would do well to get some help with all of this. It could be professional help, but professional does not always mean competent. It could be the really strong neighbor woman who has long ago overcome her abuse issues and demonstrates much wisdom in her life. It could be that you read heaps and heaps of books on the topic until you have explored many perspectives on the issues and thought it all through so many times that you really have noticed a dramatic change in yourself and the sorts of people you attract into your life. Do not delay. Face the fears. Work through the issues.Somehow, some way, do the body work necessary to release the built up emotion that is held in your body. Massage, Reiki, Acupuncture, Acupressure, intense physical exercise, punching a punching bag, beating pillows, and other therapies like these can help you release the emotions held in the body.
This part bears repeating...you will know when you have healed yourself when you attract totally different sorts of people in y5B4our life on a consistent basis and when you are totally repelled by harmful people. If for some unexplainable reason you continue to attract harmful perpetrators into your life you still have work to do, you will not be safe until you complete this work. You cannot change the perpetrator. Perhaps I can help them change, if they are ready, but my point of attraction is that of a healer. Patch Adams was a healer; his girlfriend was a victim who was still not healed herself. Patch Adams was helping this mentally ill man gain moments of sanity; his girlfriend was giving this man an opportunity to commit further abuse. One day you may be a healer too...one day. Do not attempt to run before you can walk.
This goes for relationships too. If you have not healed whatever dysfunction that is in you that caused a past relationship to go bad, then you will be the most attracted to those who will help you see that the dysfunction is still inside of you. If you want a really great relationship it is not going to happen until you really and truly change. You just don't have the point of attraction for a sweet and loving relationship when you have major dysfunctional ideas about life floating around in your head.
This article was not meant to answer your specific question about a specific problem. It is meant to help you realize the necessity of NOT sweeping personality problems under the carpet. Anybody can heal themselves. There is so muc57Ch help available these days; don't let the lack of money stop you.
There are plenty of people who will help you for free (like me for example). There are plenty of books that cover just about any topic there is. There are even heaps of self-help groups of many varieties available. Seek and you will find them.
Michael Skowronski writes about experiences and thoughts that changed his life and made him embrace a higher level of spiritual wisdom in his blog http://gr8wisdom.com He is the author of the book entitled Unforgettable: A Love and Spiritual Growth Story - http://www.unforgettablebook.com an unusual love story and time-proven wisdom.
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